There isn’t much to debate about the main reason most dads decide to stay home: The kids. Being at home with the children has an added benefit for stay-at-home dads – not having to worry about child care.
The stresses are natural and plentiful about needing someone else watch the kids, whether the care is taking place in a home, at a day care center, with a nanny or even, to an extent, with your own family. There likely isn’t a parent out there that wouldn’t choose to watch his own child if the option existed.
There are many questions to ask, referrals to get, and teachers to shadow when making a day care decision. Even if everything checks out and a parent is confident with the care his child will receive, there is always the lingering fear of how the kids will react during the day or how they actually will be treated. Not to mention the guilt of having to say goodbye to the kids every day.
Much of that is eliminated by taking on the task yourself.
Then there are the benefits of being with the children all day. The values a dad can instill, the family bond that can be developed and the hands-on life experiences that will naturally occur.
Expensive CareThrow in the cost, and the decision to avoid child care is easier. Child care can be one of a family’s biggest expenses, rivaling the mortgage payment.
According to the National Association of Child Care Resource & Referral Agencies’ (NACCRRA) 2008 report on child care costs, the full-time care for an infant, typically less than a year old, was as high as $14,591 last year. Care for a 4-year-old was up to $10,787 and part-time care for a school-aged child was as high as $8,600.
The report also states that care rose 6.5% for an infant and 5.2% for a 4-year-old in 2007 from 2006.
Now, these numbers are the high end of the spectrum. Most parents aren’t spending more than $25,000 a year to have a baby and his older sister looked after. But it clearly illustrates the financial burden child care can be.
After taxes and the day care bill, just how much of a paycheck is left?
Pros and ConsThis all is not to say child care isn’t important. Most parents have to work to make ends meet and someone has to watch the children.
Child care can be beneficial in social aspects and preparing a kid for elementary school. They learn how to act with other kids and will get a jump start on education. Most preschools and child care centers offer a daily curriculum for every age group.
If all the parents’ homework is done, the children will also get a fun, nurturing and loving place to spend the say.
Debates on the effects of child care are fruitless and studies will never be conclusive. Many of us have survived some form of child care and turned out alright.
Still, if both parents are working full time, the kids are likely spending up to and beyond 50 hours a week in someone else’s care. Subtract sleeping schedules, and the kids are spending much more time with their caregiver than with their parents.
That’s a lot of time of a childhood missed. Time that can be saved if the stay-at-home option is out there. It adds up to the greatest advantage to being a stay-at-home dad: being able to be with the kids all day, every day.